No Help At All

*** If you are offended by profanity,

you should go visit someone else today.***

I made some promises to myself about things I would do differently in my new life in Montana. I would eat better, stress less and I would cuss less.

The first two weeks here were very calm and nice. My sweet hubs and my beautiful sister were here for the first week, and the second week was just me and my puppy, Rooster Cogburn. Sweet Hubs had a project to finish at his work so he would remain in Arizona for almost three months while I got started in Montana. I knew that this temporary separation would tax all three of those promises to self, but I was committed to trying.

The second week of my living here went really, really well. With only a puppy to talk to and basically being on vacation, I had no trouble with stress and no urge to cuss. Eating better wasn't as easy because cooking for just me is kind of... meh. But I tried.

Then the first of May, I started my new job and sensed trouble almost immediately. It is clearly a bilingual office: English and Profanity. But I was resolute and tried to make sure I didn't swear, without looking like I frowned upon others doing so. Go ahead and cuss. It truly doesn't bother me. On the second day, I went with my trainer to the post office to collect the company mail (why I needed training for this, I don't know).

Making conversation, and purely out of curiosity, I asked my trainer about a flowering shrub that grows pretty much everywhere around here. "Do you happen to know what the name of that shrub is?" I asked.

And in a very acidic tone and over-loud voice, she barked, "It's a FUCKING WEED!"

And I knew I was sunk.