Thanks, Scott, for the inspiration for this post.  And, no, Scott is NOT the one who clears his throat a lot. LOL.  Honest.

Have you ever noticed that men and women have different ears?  Oh, sure, men's ears and women's ears might look similar, but they sure don't work the same.

If a woman says to a man,

"I'm really tired. Are you ready for dinner? It's ahi tuna, wild rice and I'm steaming some broccoli. My sister found out the sex of her little baby bump today, but she isn't telling. I'll call her tonight and get her to tell me."
He only hears every few words:  "I'm really blah blah blah ready for blah blah blah, wild blah blah steaming blah blah blah sex blah blah tonight blah."

She says he should take the time to fish a few quarters out of the change bowl for junior's milk money.  He hears that he should take the time to fish.

She say she loves it when his mother takes those long vacations in Bermuda.  He hears that she loves his mother.

And when she says the trash stinks and he needs to take it out, he might hear no sound at all.  Men's ears work like that.

Women, on the other hand, have very different ears. We don't skip words our man says, WE hear words that aren't even there.  If a man says, "I saw Julie from high school, and she has hardly changed."  SHE hears, "You've gotten old.  Julie is still young and pretty and you're a fat old hag.  I'm going to run away with Julie tomorrow."  So she goes to Dillards to get a new dress to make herself feel better.

A man says that the lasagna at their business lunch that day was the only bright spot in the meeting, and she hears that her lasagna isn't as good as the caterers.

He says it's a beautiful blue sky, and she hears that he would like it better if she had blue eyes instead of brown.

And if a man says, "What size are those jeans you are wearing?"  ........

Well, at that point, a smart man would duck.

(Naturally, this is all observation.  The Sweet Hubs never fails to pay attention to my words, and I never ever blow things out of proportion. Never. Really.)

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