Ugly Bagels

I made bagels.  I don't know what I did wrong. They taste great but they're uglier than a mud fence. As in butt-ugly. Coyote UGLY.

The bread looks picture perfect. The bagels, not so much. My grandpa, the baker, would have been mighty disappointed in me.

I made eggplant parmigiana. Except I accidentally bought low-fat mozzarella. I wasn't wearing my glasses. What, exactly, IS low-fat mozzarella? It didn't melt and brown and get all wonderfully gooey and crispy-cheesy. It just kind laid there, like a lazy white dog on a hot day. It didn't drip down over the sides of the eggplant slices. It didn't get those wonderful bubbles of brown goodness. I'm sorry to tell you that it didn't do much of anything. I might as well have topped my lovely eggplant with tofu. Blecchhhh. Mom's friend Carmella would have been mighty disappointed in me.

Lately I've been having trouble with my menu planning. I guess I'm too many years distant from my education in Home Economics. It has happened time and time again. I look down at the dinner I've prepared, and I notice that everything is the same shape or the same color or something. One night, everything was white. Chicken breasts, mashed potatoes and cauliflower. Or round. As in meatballs, baby red potatoes and green peas. Good color combinations, but everything was round. My home-ec teacher would be mighty disappointed in me.

I've been walking around with a button missing from my coat...all winter, I think. Momma taught me how to sew. I can certainly sew on a button! It's a good thing Momma lives a few hours away and never sees me in my coat, or she'd be disappointed in me, too!

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