Memories.....light the corners of my mind?

Is that the line from the song? I don't know.

I was thinking about my memories of my lost loved ones. All my grandparents are gone now, my Dad, beloved uncles, my brother.....all gone. My memories of them are an interesting study in contrasts.

Some things I remember with perfect clarity. The way my father's hands looked, the way my Holland grandma used the pronoun "Ik", instead of "I"... somethings appear in my mind with an immediacy that makes them seem present and real and not thoughts of someone gone. Other things are softer-edged and misty: my mind's bokeh. (Look it up.)

I was very small when my grandfathers passed away, so the only memories left to me are the sharp, clear things that impressed me deeply at the time. I didn't get time to develop those amorphous impressions, my comprehension of others as human beings, that I had with my other loved ones. Those are the things that make up my watercolor-y memories of loved ones past.

For a time I was concerned that I was forgetting loved ones gone. I have come to realize, however, that I'm not forgetting them at all. My thoughts of them and memories of them are becoming more and more a part of the tapestry that is me. I don't have to have the sharp edges of every image to have a clear understanding. Time blurs the picture somewhat, but the image is still comprehensible and relevant.

I wonder, what will be the things which stand out for others, when it's my time to go? What will my sons recall about their mom with crystal clarity, a shining recall of who I was or what I looked like?